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Alarming loneliness

The silence overwhelms as the scheduled program falls silent, sleep dictated by timer- still elusive, rebellious,

I am never bored in exhaustion, not really. My thoughts keep me company in the dead of the night, often taunting, tormenting,

The dog abandons her fruitless effort to cajole me into a ball of comfort and cuddle. Her restless paws, and exaggerated sighs betray her frustration. Her own space beckons.

The bed grows to manage tangled legs, and knotted thoughts chasing the one relevant demand- go to sleep.

Eyes closed in protest, breaths in four, boxed and closing in…. I wonder if one more pillow would reinforce my wall. What once was comfort, and security, has become the foundation of my prison, a padded reminder that I am not alone.

I have my thoughts for companions, voices on mute yet they still holler, disgusted with my retreat.

Sleep continues to be elusive, as comfort fades to a stone wall defied by logic. Awake and hunkered down for a long dark night, I shrug into a blanket of loneliness, and drift over the line of consciousness, incessant bleating, chiding me to stay awake.

@jenkress

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It has been awhile…

Silence has led to a slow burn lesson on so many levels. Surprisingly, I woke a few nights with words spilling out of my mind. It has been a very long time since that has happened. Here is one, of two, unpolished for a reason. Imperfect speaks volumes…

Choose me

Not because you’re bored, or

because I fit you like a

worn pair of sneakers…

Choose me because “We” make

the adventures of a lifetime possible

– a choice that excites-

hearts galloping, minds racing, while

settling at the same time,

peacefully.

When cotton candy skies and

morning dew surrender to the

blistering phoenix of high noon; alone, I

hover, to contemplate the fall to dusky

solitude and silent shadow.

Rather, I choose you.

@jenkress